I took a moment. Sometimes we have to. It is easy to get lost in the rigors of your daily life. The alarms, the deadlines, to-do lists, and the responsibilities. So, I finally took a moment with my family. My only responsibility was to them. I allowed the rest to fall away. If only for a moment.
There were moments.
Life is only a series of moments strung together. One after the other. We let so many of them slip by without realizing. Sometimes we even do what we can to hasten the quickly running sands of time. You cannot get that time back. Moments missed can turn into regrets. Regrets that can stay with you for months, years, and sometimes lifetimes.
As a society, we seem to only think about what is next. We don’t enjoy the present moment. We allow moments of the past, or even moments of the future, to steal away the joy of the present moment.
We can’t stop to smell the flowers if we never notice them because we are holding onto yesterday’s dying flowers or tomorrow’s seeds.
If we burn the candle at both ends, we quickly become too busy just trying to manage the flames. We can no longer just enjoy the light it provides.
Many men get caught in the act of providing. They find their identity in it. Their value.
Constantly moving forward all the time seems like the right answer to us. We often feel, if we stop even for just a moment, it could damage the family. Yet in reality it is our inability to slow down that can damage the family.
They don’t only need the things I provide. They need me.
They need my advice; they need my experience. They need my love. Most importantly, they need my time.
It is easy for me to hear that and continue to convince myself that the extra work I am putting in is worth it. Even more important than spending time with them. In reality, it doesn’t even compare.
I tend to consider stopping work to spend time with my family as somehow hindering my progress of providing. Yet the reality is that it is more valuable. I am still providing. Even still, I am providing more important things.
They need to know their father loves them. That he cares for them.
They need to laugh with their father more than they need the newest sneakers.
They need memories to reach back and use in their own lives.
Often times the big things seem little and the little things seem big.
You don’t remember what shoes you had on when you lose a parent. You just know you lost a parent.
When I was 13 my father died. I don’t remember what shoes I had on when I heard that news. Although, that is not the best example. I didn’t know him. To this day I have never shed a tear over his death. 33 years ago. He was a man who chased the wrong things.
He died alone. In a prison cell. He made the wrong choices. He put what didn’t matter in front of what did matter. He made mistakes throughout his whole life. Over and over again he chose the wrong thing. Had it not been for my dear mother taking the time to fill those empty spaces as best she could. Who knows what I would be today, or if I would even be alive.
If he would have chosen us, he would have become a better man for it. Not only do we give ourselves to our children, but we receive a priceless gift back from them. They fill us up if we take the time to pour ourselves into them.
If we aren’t careful, we could find ourselves on a similar road. They’re may not be bars that we can see, but they are there. We may not all die in a prison made of brick and mortar, but we will all die in a prison.
I want to teach my children by my actions.
The most important thing I want my children to grow up to be are good people.
I want them to love God, and others and I want them to show it.
So I took a moment. A week with my family away from the daily BS and the rigors and stresses of life. It was something that we all needed. It was something we all need more of. We run to each other as a family to protect each other. To support and heal together from the damage life deals out.
Taking those moments watching my kids play together on the beach. Smiling, laughing, and just loving each other was a reminder of why I work as hard as I do.
Why my wife and I do what we do. Even when we don’t want to.
It is the same reason we as a society are so easy to trap into this system. The system designed to keep us busy rather than to promote our liberty and value as a people.
Hamsters in a wheel. Moving fast, but only the smart ones break free of the wheel, and begin to discover their free will. As well as the rewards that come with it. Sadly, since I have rejoined the wheel, I see now more than ever the machine we are all crushed under, yet working for.
The kids are why.
Why we get up so early.
Why we go to bed so late.
Why we try to fit so much into the time we have left after work is done for the day.
Why we spend so much time worrying about what we can provide. Worrying about our worth. Worrying about the job we are doing. Worried about the money we don’t have, and the bills that we do have. The deadlines, the car rides, the wolves at the door.
Somehow it all becomes worth it with just a flash of a smile from them.
Those smiles.
Those memories we make together, the lessons they learn from those experiences. It helps shape who they are. It helps shape who I am too.
My kids have taught me many things.
They are the reason I drag myself out of bed and grind through another day. They are the reason I became engaged in this patriotic fight for the soul of America. They are the reason that I try to build a legacy to leave behind. I try to leave a measuring stick for them. A good example to follow.
They are the reason I will never give up. I will never relent. I will do my duty, no matter how much it hurts.
As always love how you can put your thoughts into words so perfectly well. I enjoyed this reading very much God bless you and the family. You are a good father, husband and provider never forget that.
I believe your children will sit with their children and describe you as the father every child deserves. Happy Father's Day Mags! Your children are blessed.